The whole process of friendship is revamped. It starts with phase 1, where we get to be “introduced” to people in a social e-network because you are their brother’s colleague’s neighbour’s classmate’s cousin. Going by the etiquettes, you are nice to someone you meet for the first time and do the usual crappy small-talk about what your do…what you want to become…what your hobbies are. Then comes phase 2, where you are expected to say ‘hi’ every time you see them online and you are supposed to be “informal” and strip your soul bare, talk about yourself and patiently listen (yawn!) to their “exciting” stories. I call phase 1 and phase 2, the “shadow” phase cos the image portrayed by a person is illusionary and too good to be true. Then comes phase 3, where you get bored and decide to shed off your nice-guy image. You’ll have to listen to things like ‘how rude you are’, ‘how you have changed so suddenly’, ‘how you are hurting others’ and a series of other lectures in this phase. I call phase 3, the “enlightment” phase. That’s because the lights in your brain are suddenly switched on and the shadow fades away. All this leaves you so numb that you start getting cynical and skeptical about the whole friendship thing. It makes you hide and ignore them.
How I wish it had been like the old days, where bumping into a friend on a busy road would make your day. Or days when school-reunions meant lot of things to talk about and update. Or you talk to someone just once in a year on his/her birthday. Or it was meaningful to spend thousands to all the way to meet a friend living in another city.
Now all I can wish to have is some space to breathe and some time for me…
hmmm.. i am getting bugged with orkut too. But i do so love to keep in touch.Its easier. :)
is that why you dont email me anymore? hahah just kidding. lots of love, bhargavi
Am i the only one here with the syndrome of keeping touch with ppl??
hey aish…it truly reflects wat i feel at times…its so much of a releif not to be in touch wid neone…just walk away….ill give u a tip….dont want ne one to disturb u…leave ur cell behind…the main culprit..wat say?
Exactly, it feels the best some days to just be left alone…to hear yourself… to be deaf to everything that’s happening around. Ahh! That’s Bliss!
I am reminded of a poem in which the poet says “we put on faces wherever we go”when i read your entry.It is very much true that relationships have become shallower now than yester years due to e-socialising etc..The saddest part is after “phase 3″ all of us have to sit back and be content that most of the world is like this and take parallel paths so that we continue to sail smoothly.There is no way to know who might play an important role in your life later and hence we will be forced to consider an enlightenment as a “storm in a cup of tea”.Being all for yourself?—-I like it very much at times….ya the switching- off-the-cell idea is a nice one.I do it all the time in my hols!
Very true u are abt the phases.An “shadow phase” nice term to use. :D
I have always been spooked by shadows, cudn’t get a better word to name that phase :P
hmmmm
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